MYEPRETTY-ROMANCE♥

Looking forward for Monday work! End up I'm so tried now. Yawns !! My heart got a load off suddenly ? Weird used to be paranoid!

Again blogging while working!!! I wanna die ar! Nayhahas heading to hougang later ! :) tired everything also so tried :) woooooooooo

Someone save me ! Tears rolling non stop down my cheeks in the morning! gosh . Why must you happily make my day and then mention those that stab my heart real deep stuff again . I tried to forget about it yesterday yet again today .

I'm like a zombie a living dead now . I don't know where i'm heading i'm lost . I feel like struggling stuff. ! I can't speak out to you ! I am a spammer to you now . I don't know what to do , i feel like shouting . I want to go somewhere where there is no one i just one to feel alone since i always do . I don't know who to talk to ending up myself always talking to myself here. Maybe i should make a trip down to the beach . Stroll along feel the wind also good . I need some fresh air to clear my brains.

Guess i really should move on with my life freaking stuck my head in my work load ! . I'm as well fragile and tired. It's not about you and only you . It's me as well . Since you can do such thing to me i face it . (WO REN LE) No longer having the part of the most important one . Ya true without my job i cant survive i basically got nothing . What you said were true la ! Can't work out find other people than get into another relationship la . But job cannot , if we lose it that's it . !
But lucky for me, i don't believe i can't get jobs outside and the prob now is i'm gonna stay strong at my current job . Earn my money have my life. ~ I will get alive dude . I won't get drug by you again . I'm awake . I should look straight and go further . All this you said is right . You are my role model .=p I respect you in some ways .

You will never get someone who just simply love you with don't know what reason and willingly for everything . I wonder why i did ? But Ya love is there. !
I basically run out of my mind . Sometimes i really wish to ask myself what is it in you i fall deeply . Maybe its god will that at my age at my time i have to meet you and unexpectedly falling deeply . Ok i accept it . I really learn many things from you . I should thank god for allowing me to meet you .

I realize love isn't everything in this world . Yes love may come out to be a help in certain period of your life . But without being realistic in life will bring you no where. So what we human being must do is not to put love in first place , you can't take 100 percents serious as it will hurt either party . I learn that i'm been always paranoid , sensitive , impatient . maybe many many faults of my turn out my past few unsuccessful relationship i didn't realize . But i strongly believe what is yours is always yours . What is not yours will never stay no matter what you do .

Time to wake up , stay fresh and start anew . Things will never be the same as wound will never heal that fast . This is gonna leave a scar in my life but i wont say its a ugly scar but a meaningful scar that i dont mind having it on me . It will always remind me for anything =p Its useful as well . Now i have to start healing my wound and protect it . I don't want any more salt water splashing onto it . And its all up to me as well .

Today is the day she ever heard the "best" thing in her life from you . "Best of the best-est" It will never be the same .

I no longer have any words to put in . This is what you want anyway ! I've stop .
For now i don't know where i'm heading to . But those words are my worst nightmare , i couldn't even imagine you were such a cruel person that you would just spell all this sentence word by word to me . I won't be leaving you , i know i let you down in many things i should amend my mistake . Yes by having all these shit . Yes like what you said FUCK YOU .
Whatever it is , i will return what i have once done wrong. But look is this happiness , by taking revenge on me ? Or what ever so call your nice ex girlfriend done to you, i have to learn and in fact help them to swallow at once ?

I'm childish , but have you try looking at my better side . Wouldn't you be childish at times ? No ! I wont remember your mistake but you remember every single one . Even just one word from my mouth is wrong and that's it for me . Have you take a look at yourself ? Are you that worth it for me to stay on strong and love madness on you . Do i deserve something nicer from you at least . Compare and compare . ! Don't come telling me you are not . Unexpectedly , you did !
You told me you don't have to live with all these ? But did you give me a chance to think or maybe i don't have to live with these . Have you really gone back into your brains to dig out some stuff and then think what if i were the one saying all this and thinking of all theses shit stuff (as mentioned by you) . You always think of how you feel , what are those importance stuff to you and what ever it is i have destroy. But in another way, am i also going through all this ?

Not only for your end everything is just important and i have to agree with it. I have my importance in my life but whereas it might be a very different issue . Apparently, you are cruel . Your mouth is such bug at times! I'm retarded ? Might as well say i'm mentally disordered . ! Isn't it a better description of me . Have you ever thought you might be the one retard at times . Thinking that everything is just there for you , that i just automatically pop out in this world to be everything you ever wanted . Sometimes , i feel right at my end . Is it too much to feel that way ? I have my rights as well . But end of everything did i do anything silly . No I still love you as much .

I remember once i waited for you just down under your block . Due to my fault again .! You didnt answer my calls not even messages . I was like a crazy women doing crazy stuff waited for you there . I thought after i see you things might at least get better! ending up asking me to get lost and i have to take a cab home . But guess what ! I wasn't even feeling down (def sad of cos .! It was a upfront reject) but i feel ease . Because i saw you safely back to your house , i manage to at least talk to you awhile . You are back home in one piece. Everything was just worry .! Have you ever got all this worries in mind . No you don't . You have too many things that i dont mind being left out . At least i got my chance to be there for you . Every single quarrel , yes you said it is all cause by me . Ok just put it that every single quarrel i start . Everything is me . But if you really put all those words (not those bad words ) really the way you talk to me . It added on of hurt and pressure is much equal to what i have done previously .

Do you really understand how i feel at times .

Nayhahahs!!!! Bored.... Miss ! Misssss! Misses! . But you Don't bother ! Eeeeee....
Yawns! Gonna have my dinner now=p HUNGRY!

Yawns !
Back from work already! Just finish bathing and i love the feeling =p I feel so fresh ... Sorry Eric for not attending your birthday party . I heard there is BBQ too .! Owwwww .. Anyway Happy Birthday bro! I seems to know you for years! Since 16 =p .... hahhas

Went Marina Square yesterday with my cousin .! Arrgghhh the urge for shopping is there .. Yet only did some window shopping .! But i feel great .. Me and emily so sua ku la can! When we reach city hall as if we came from the mountain .! Kinda lost our way while walking to Marina Square . Just freaking long we didn't go out luhs ...
Yes Emily! Wait for you to come back from thailand we will go shopping and really shop! It's time man to add on more stuff into our closet .!! Nayhahhas.

Had dinner at Yukiyaki! Wasn't the best one but we enjoyed .! After that we stink with the oil and BBQ smell.! Gosh . =p Cost us like $53 plus .! Just for the two of us ? Nayhahahs . Dinner ended ! Headed to mustafa.! When to shop for a toy car which must be a D.I.Y and with the brand of BMW.!! Ended up going to an indian shopping centre for it.! Basically Marina Square didn't have it... Overall was tired ! But enjoyed =p
Looking forward for next meet up with emily ...

Again back to my love life.! Nothing much recently , not much to comment .! No comment . Just let it be =p . Me Me and the old Me ! .
Went for movie , a kinda unpleasant date . Seems like it's my fault for the movie.! At JURONG POINT. ! Whatever ! Some stuffs i heard there from him wasn't nice.! Especially the uncomfortable word. .. Ya Haunted Changi wasn't very nice. I wanted to puke when i watch .! The camera is moving here and there making me dizzy. .

Arrgghh really whatever.. Gonna eat . I'm hungry .And that's it .
The end of post .! Gosh .!

Weeee its a weekend again ! I shall rest at home and watch all my drama .
Punishing in the night but shall relax in the afternoon . My head is bursting ya! I should let my kite fly higher and loosen the string =p As it's breaking soon .

I thought for the whole night , i should take things so hard. The more i do the worst it is . What for make things so difficult . I'm miserable already , it's your revenge already isn't it? Whatever it is i'm not gonna expect anymore things. See how my life things go if there is good stuff i take bad stuff i keep quiet isn't it better too?
Whatever is it i'm not gonna change for who it is . I will be myself =p Continue to have things happening like that i will get sick too . It wouldn't be always me . Don't trust me it's up to you I don't have strength to do anything. To be honest this is the most tiring love i ever have ! You want it to be whatever it is your decision .! I've got no say . But don't thing you don't make mistake . Wake up dude , not everyone can love a person like how i do . ! I'm not gonna love anyone so much anymore . You don't even understand my love when you say you do . It's all just making you look more mature me more childish .

Deep down am i that childish no .! You think you suffer and been through things that you think you can step me down on the floor . No , i have gone through things you have not too . And yes you might have gone through some i don't. We learn from each other but not only me chasing after you !

Whatever it is, its enough of me hiding. !

Devastated !
I'm destroyed !
I'm hopeless!
Can just things get right for god sake !
I can't sleep again.. Always having trouble to sleep but nobody knows .
Am I abnormal? Why am I always acting weird . Crying for so much things till I can't stop at all .
My eyes hurt .

Can somebody just come pamper me like I am a princess for once . Ive lost feelings for much things . I really wish to feel it again.
My heart hurts , my eye hurts and my head hurts . Gosh what is wrong with me. What am I fear about . Am I just so desperate ? Or what I dunno I just want to feel love again

I will no longer try and putting effort to be somebody!! Great job dude ! Really what a great nice picture you paint for me .
Thanks

What now ????
Hmmmm ...
Still don't know what's the prospect !

Leading me on ? Or just nothing ?
What should i do in life as well?

SENGKANG MEE SUA !!!! CRAVING ! HELP

Hmmmm good night Singapore !!! Sleeping :) soooooo tried ！I want to get up on time to get my breakfast:D

What the hell is this in the world . I don't seems to derserve anything good ... I feel awful I'm like a toy to everything single thing.
As and when when people feel like it they can do anything to me . When I want I don't get!!!

Really what the fuck .. Bloodly ass . I need to go along the sea side to shout fucking out loud .!!!!!!!!!!